Poems

My poetry was published in 4 Polish anthologies of modern poetry – titled : “Poezjo dodaj nam skrzydeł” (2009-2014), “The Grammateion : the St. Michael’s College journal of the arts” (2012, 2014, 2016) ; as well as, in the WAX Poetry and Art Magazine (2016).

love


Early summer night

Awaken by a memory
I lay motionless staring into darkness
trying to remember
nothing
deprived of senses I suddenly realize
the sky is blinking at me
with your eyes
forcing me to smile

I am still alive.

Bell Jar

When you cut me down
I lost all sense of direction
On my knees days span out of control
While I asked myself the same question

This morning I woke up to a crack in the sky
I know… right? It is insane
How much pain replaces love in your veins
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead *

Your eyes shone so bright I forgot others
In my life – like a moth I was drown to a flame
ready to die
giving up all I had
for love
for a chance to be reborn – but not today

now I know that you simply do not care

                                                                                                   

                                                                                *Sylvia Plath

Naturally

You have lost me
in the horror of your last deed
unimaginable
happened
hey ho, to a hangman we go
unwinding reality’s cutting edge

the telephone does not ring
is there nothing left to say?

Fear

Colorless streets full of reflections of your hair
in the crowd nowhere to be met again
hopeless heart chasing after that familiar shape
a chance
you would not recognize me face to face

Crusoe

Your constant reminder of why you did it
does not soften my crushing
you say
remember flowers of the past summer
taste the moisture of a morning lotus
dry sticks impale my skin in dreams
thorns bleed me more than indulgent memories
and that elusive fear
fear of future happy nightmares
shatters me completely

Where is the shore to leave footprints at the end?

Change of mind

You dare to ask me how my days are
while watching me crawl on my fours – you kiss me
seeing your eyes I breathe their light
taking that knife deeper into my heart
you cut me
sealing my faith – I inhale your scent
you live for him feeding on me
touch by touch I disappear
yet at the goodbye you say – you love me

This must be a dream

Subtle nightmare of your absence
from which I cannot wake up
hurting myself for pain – possible way out
only producing another day without you
worthless life
which I hope is not real – but just a dream
from which I will wake up
breathless in your arms
embraced and kissed – at ease
falling asleep

Starting over

You hacked me open
not knowing what you will find inside
can of worms?
can of diamonds?
I build myself against storms
hurting
stone walls
impenetrable without love
now on my knees – again
taking a new brick in my hand

Fata morgana

Now – I see
the mirage of water
just in front of me – unattainable
caprice of mind that I want to perceive

I was too weak to look another way
while you cleaned your life – now
thirst is the hurting that takes us apart
I am sitting on a curb – watching stars

With all my wit
I wasn’t able to predict
the shift of your happiness to be me
sitting on a curb – waiting for a truck

Ginger

Crimson dreams
full of emptiness
in shape of your lips
will not materialize
sunrises of your hair – on my face
without opening eyes I know
You are not there
but dust of dried promises of love
holds my breath
and only pain in my chest proves that
I am alive – and awake

Run

The storm is brewing
can feel its swollen underbelly of mistakes
that could take your life
with his hands
Our hands encircle margins of sin
outside boundaries in silence and terror
give me a hug – last time
let me fill your body fitting mine
and go

survive

You can go now

I cannot be hurt – anymore
I am all made out of holes
like that guy in a song
lovers can punch through paper-thin walls
now
you can go
cherish new life – which I can give not
just like a tambourine man to a rolling stone
love will set it free
if you let it go
so, let it go…

When I entered you

I felt the rain
an eye of the storm
an inevitable crevice
to which hanged all droplets
of a drying soul
When I entered you
a spring opened sky eyes
and
I drowned

Embrace

Looking for pulse – whose?
goosebumps surrender to touch
stabilizing balance of senses
even though the body is more than weight and gravity
we crossed our paths – I am holding you in my grip
yet I have no idea what to do with it
you stop my steps
like a stone

You do not say – No

I do not say – Yes
Somehow you spill over
Boundaries
Rules
Smoking guns
Your eyes are
Looking in me for something there is not
Just vast burnout of life
Empty and always hungry
For warmth of human touch – In which you got caught
I keep the cage open
Why don’t you fly away?
My heart…

No longer reaching with my sight

I can touch you with hand
tongue leg knee
in continuous pursuit of warmth or chill
from shut eyes to cockcrow
life in hourglass sheets
folds to us reality in lumps of dream
and just the scent of your skin
stands as my world
I know

I will not be destroyed

Rime

If there is no God – and there is none
ending my life
with every sun I blame my faith
for what I become
watching my void with growing scorn
I push away
my weeping soul
and there you are
my tender time
shrinking to pebble – eternal ice.

Traffic

The road’s black tongue
licked the horizon of Tuesday’s goals
in an obvious attempt to stop me
from approaching them in a speedy car
zooming through the city
with happy heart beat
of not only my own

your eyes water blue in ecstasy.

Daydreaming

Emptying my mind
only to find myself
in a tunnel
hanging by a thread
above your smile
that night like today
I am holding myself
in my arms
without much tenderness
but faithfully *

closing my eyes.

                              *Samuel Beckett

You are walking my dreams

naked
in the background
your white skin
perfect – mountains
are calling me
while I am stuck
in the valley
of living.

Don’t

feed me with kisses
leaving me alone
while rainy morning
caresses dying leaves
in colorful pallets
of the season
drop after drop

don’t

 

 

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